on Mar 30, 2013
Hey I liked this a lot. What an awesome 3:30 runtime! I actually thought this was pretty simple and straight-forward. I don't think it was too complicated or anything, it just felt like the comedy didn't all land. Those cut-away jokes work real well in a longer-form show, but in something like this it can be pretty distracting. We're focused on the characters and their needs/wants.
I'd say just make another show. Have just as much fun, find something new that you want to make a show about. Focus on making yourselves laugh and don't worry as much about what the "Channel 101 Audience" will find funny.
Great pilot. Make more stuff.
Apr 01, 2013 at 4:26pm
Apr 01, 2013 at 1:33pm
Hey Joelle -
I think this was a great example of a show that had all the right pieces (good sound, good photography, good actors, interesting premise) that never really formed a cohesive whole. I think it's useful to break down the story you want to tell and then see if everyone/everything in your show is essential to telling that story.
This show had the office happenings (the editor and his weird friend), the photographers and their rival Aaron Moles, the celebrities in the house, and the Gary Busey "Family Guy" style jokes. There are so many elements there that none of them got the proper amount of attention and I never got a good grasp of what the show was supposed to be.
Going forward, I would just try to tell a simple story in the most straightforward way possible. Oversimplify, even. This was a good looking submission.
Apr 01, 2013 at 1:34am
Would love some feedback on this one: https://vimeo.com/63001630
Mar 30, 2013 at 6:03pm
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